I thought of having some tiny goals each month to have something to work for would be fun. At least for me. And now when it is August and my birthday month I wanted to try something new.
Having goals in life always keeps you motivated to move forward in life. Some people like to focus on one or two BIG goals for the future and others prefer smaller goals to help move forward.
Myself? I prefer smaller goals but I also have big goals I try to focus on to achieve.
August 2025
The goals of this month is (3-5 mini goals per month);
Weightloss (continue with it). Try lose minimum 2kg.
Participate/attend in school as much as possible
Become a better blogger and really try focus on it to move forward with it
Plan my next solo traveler trip
Continue to work on my mental health
I know these goals seems weird but they might can keep me on the ground and move forward.
My mental health is my top priority though (even if its last on the list). My mental health isn’t the best and I must get out of it.
one step closer to my new career. I’m excited but terrified on the same time.
After 11th August it will come up school posts. My daily life, lifestyle. I hope you all are excited and ok with following my journey to become a preschool teacher with specialized for diagnosis.
They arrived with Early Bird which means they come really fast in the mail. To my surprise, the books came within two days. That’s crazy fast!
I got a notification on my phone that it was delivered and my heart took an extra skip. Now it feels kinda official that I will be one step closer.
I am scared though. Will I be able to manage to understand the academic words? Sure it’s not as hard as University level of my future school but after been scanning /looking through them fast, my brain stopped working.
I will have more courses during this education but these are the first three books I’ll use for the first semester. According to the schedule, there will be two more different classes per week but no books to them? I am so confused about that.
As you all can read, I have mixed feelings about this career choice. I really want this but I am terrified… of failing, of the school, of the classmates, teachers etc. How will it go? So many thoughts, feelings etc that I need to sort out and try find the motivation and the encouragement that I’m getting closer to the job I really want.
Hello my loves! today has been a hectic day on the blog and real life. It just occurred to me that I start in school in 1O days! What!?
This time I am actually super nervous and scared. Just like when I did my nurse assistant education. This education is at the same school that I hate and where I did the N A E. My former high-school. I have so many bad bad memories from there.
I’m nervous due to new class, new teachers and my size in a school with 3K kids. Yes iam preparing mentally for bullying I just have to get used to it. Hard, yes but I must.
School supplies I need to buy; There is alot! Notebooks, pencils, rubbers, books, etc. Ohmy. Books is ordered for this semester though. But not for the other two but one step at the time.
I have totally forgotten what is needed when studying! Except when I did math, but now iam going back to a big school . Which bag? backpack? hand bag? shoulder bag? Style? dye my hair before that? makeup? Entry access card?
So much to think off! For fun I checked on Shein (no im not ordering there, just browsing to get ideas of what I need to buy) and I found a cute pencil case, bags etc but we all know how Shein is. I used to love them but not now after truth has come out.
What education am I doing this time? This time I am not gonna study so my grades gets better. I’m actually gonna study so I take one step closer to the education preschool teacher. I dont really know how to translate the education from Swedish to english other then I use google translator and that translation sounded so weird.. but (according to Google translator) Childcare training with focus on disabilities. .. sounds so weird. On swedish it’s Barnskötare med specialisering funktionsnedsättning.
When I’m done with this education I can work in preschool with special need kids. Student assistant to someone who needs extra help etc. I am so excited about that part.
How did I come up with this idea to become this? Well, I love teaching stuff. I hate standing infront of a whole class though but teaching one on one is no problem. Also I get a chance to learn more about my son’s diagnosis, what to do, how to communicate etc. So its a winwin for me.
Why the career change? honestly, the N.A.E was a promise to my mother before she passed. I have always struggled with what I actually wanted to work with in life. Even though I love taking care of elderly people, I have seen so much that has made me change my mind. It has given me some sort of trauma (not the elderly but the staff and no matter how much you tell the boss, nothing happens) so I decided to stop work at the hospital, senior homes etc.
With this, I can actually help and teach children. Be their helping hand on the same time as I get to learn more professionally about diagnoses etc.
Excited, nervous, terrified and happy. Mixed feelings about this but I think its because the education is held at my former high school.
Hopefully these feelings and thoughts will pass as soon as I start in school and gotten to know the people.
July 18th 8pm I took the train down from where I live to the airport Arlanda Stockholm, Sweden. 06am the flight left for Italy and I was at the hotel around 9am. It was my first time traveling solo to a country I have never been to. I was scared, nervous and excited on the same time. After my flight to Norway (2024, first time on plane..) I have been terrified of going on planes. This time, down it was alright but way home, ohmygod.
Here is some memories, ups and downs, plus and minus, and the whole shebang about my personal opinions and experience .
NOTE; these are my opinions and experience. Venice is different for everyone but here in this post I write my experience.
Most memorable things/moments
I actually have a few memorable moments of this trip.
1. The tourist of myself on the first day. I was so impressed of the buildings but when i saw my first palm tree ever. Ohmygod, the smile on my face was huge (I love palm trees). My inner little child cried a bit. It has always been a dream of mine to see real palm trees. We dont have those in Sweden.
2. The fight between people who were drinking and their fights for a pack of smokes in a vending machine. (Not a fun situation but its interesting to see how angry people can become when it comes to nicotine).
3. I met a photographer I taught how to take macro, landscape etc type of pictures (he was a professional portrait photographer).
4. Burano! The colors! Ohmy. (pictures will come)
5. The sunsets and lightning show
Most disappointment of my trip?
• The most disappointment for me on the trip was actually the expectations people had given me for this trip. Because it was not as everyone has told me, what i have seen online or in movies, which made me really really upset. Everyone talks about the romance, the lights, the buildings etc.
• NO turtles! I went to a park where they have said and shown pictures to me about wild turtles. I went there but no turtles 😭
• I went to a steak restaurant. I notified the staff where I was gonna sit (due to I didnt know where to sit). I took a both and I waited 30 minutes to get service but none came even though the staff saw me sitting there and I made hand gestures that I wanted to order. I left the restaurant and told them how bad they treated me.
What didn’t I like with the trip?
• The food! Ohmygod people has told me “you must eat a real Italian pizza!” “you MUST eat pasta with pesto” etc. I tried the pizza (not pasta. couldn’t find any). I tried 3 different (on picture, only two of them) kinds of pizza and I was so disappointed. Just mashed tomatoes as sauce, no spices or what so ever. I tried with black pepper and salt to make it atleast eatable but no. Luckily the pizzas were “cheap”.
• The shower in my hotelroom. Oh lord it was tiny. But it worked atleast.
• How insanely crowded the transportations were. You could barely sit and when I managed to get a spot to sit, I always gave it away to either an older person or a child.
What did I not do in Italy?
• Went on gondolas. They were ridiculously expensive and honestly, not worth it.
• Didn’t have a full day at the area with churches etc (San Marco I think the area is called). I just walked through it very fast to get on the other side of Venice before the bus left.
• I did not buy typical Italian stuff.
• Used a bathroom outside my hotelroom. I was scared ok! 😭 some were horrible! Some were literally straight out of a horror movie.
• Went on a tramp/those trains in cities
• try the bidé or what it calls, in the hotelroom. Looks scary and honestly, i dont know what to use it for
What do I regret?
• Eating the cheese and bacon chicken burger at BurgerKing. I have never thrown away food as fast as I did when I tried the first bite. Luckily I had ordered chili cheese balls as well so I had something in my stomach.
I tried to eat the lid with only bacon and cheese but no.
Pictures from BurgerKing.
• I regret not buying those decoration masks. We had those when I was younger but I think my brother threw them away. I wanted to start collect those again. It’s a childhood memory.
• I regret not using my cameras but couldn’t due to the heat. All my pictures in the blog from Italy is taken with my phone and WordPress doesn’t make it fun to upload due to the very bad quality of them here even though they are sharp and great on other social medias.
• Buying a powerbank from flying tiger but I was desperate. My phone died and I was supposed to meet up a friend I met there so I bought a cheap one. But hey, it worked.
Shopping?
• I went to Primark. I was surprised that they had that store. I bought almost all my stuff i brought back home from there.
sports bra, water bottle/mugs for myself and my son, sandals, waterborne with stitch for my best friend, hats and sunglasses for my son. Sunglasses for myself. Bathroom/toiletries bags that I will actually use to my camera gears. Face wipes (7 packs), wallet.
(I bought more but can’t remember right now)
I never tried the bras (t shirt bras). I went back to Primark the day after and bought more sports bras instead. This is just a bit of what I bought.
• I bought a l o t of fruits and water. I pretty much lived on fruits. I tried many times to eat warm/hot food in the heat but I really couldn’t. (including the pizzas, I threw them away). I also bought Ice Teas, Sprite Zero and Pepsi max.
• Flying tiger; the powerbank (worthless) and a mug which unfortunately is broken.
• After sun .. I got so burned 1h in the Venezia I had to buy after sun.
Fun stuff I did/hear/see
• I tried those electric scooter/kick bike for the first time and I loved it! I used them a lot! Too bad they were absolutely ridiculously expensive.
• I tried one sip of that Jack Daniel’s and Coke. I had seen it alot and remembered how people had praised it. Mind you, that I absolutely dislike alcohol but wanted to try this one anyway.
One sip and I threw it away. Luckily it was cheap.
I actually took two pictures of myself to show my friends that I tried it. I DO NOT PROMOTE ALCOHOL! This was just a fun thing for me to try and I was alone. My son was not with me. I dont drink in general and would never drink if my son was with me.
• Getting compliments. I got a lot of compliments because of my size, my look etc. I even got called Queen Viking from one when I answered his question where I was from. He thought I was from Scotland but I told him I was from Sweden. “AH! QUEEN VIKING! beautiful Queen viking!”. That was funny.
• Hummingbird! I saw my very first Hummingbird with my own eyes! It was exciting but on same time it was a sad moment. Why sad? because in every movie / series I have seen where they show Hummingbird, all the pictures and clips I have seen, the Hummingbird is a tiny tiny small bird but the one I saw was a moth kinda looking one.
Plus and Minus & the Explanations about Venice
Plus & the explanations
● Transportation (bus and trains)
My hotel is just a few minutes away from the city so that is a plus. My hotel is also close to the bus stop so I can go pretty much where I want.
The number 7E went to the city pretty much every 20 minutes, which was really good. It also went back to Metre where I stayed at ever 20minutes.
The number 13 didn’t go so often as 7E but it went pretty good though so I could go to the shopping mall
● Electric kickbikes
First time I ever tried one and I can honestly say.. I was terrified. After the first time, I used them often and honestly, I wanted to go on them all the time to explore. So easy to use and you go far one few minutes
● Foodstores pretty much everywhere
When the hotel is closed after breakfast, I can always count on foodstores. There is a foodstore around the corner of my hotel which is ok. But the other day I found other foodstores that I went to
● Breakfast at the hotel
Only plus was that Breakfast was included in the package deal I had at the hotel.
● The architecture/ buildings / houses
Venice is full of old buildings, interesting architecture. Which is what I love to see when im not at home. Venezia is full of houses that looks like Spanish/ Mexican houses and I LOVE those
● Fruits, ice tea and water
Thank god for fruits, water and ice tea. I barely eat anything during the days during this massive heat but I force myself to eat something. Diabetic you know. Ice tea to keep my sugarlevel stable. I drank mostly water.
● Shopping
going to an other city to go shopping is something special. Sure there is a shopping center near the hotel i stay at but it was nothing for me. But going to an other city i found Primark, which is the only 2nd time I have been at.
Minus & the explanations
● Language crash
Unfortunately I didn’t speak Italian other than “Thank You” “Thank you so much” “hello” “goodmorning”. I spoke English though but what made the language crash was that not many speaks English there. Not even young people. So it was hard to communicate with people luckily I remembered and used Google translator, voice translation.
● Breakfast at the hotel
Sadly, the breakfast was a disappointment. The Italians love cakes and sugar as breakfast and me having diabetes and caramelized apples.. isn’t good. So I pretty much just had a Lil piece of bread I found but it made me feel so so bad afterwards so I went to the store and bought fruits instead
● the shower
well, let me tell you like this.. I’m fat (yes I know, bad word but its the truth) and having a small small shower in a corner wasn’t a good choice however I did take showers daily. 🙌🏻
● Euro (the currency)
This currency was so confusing. I’m just used to swedish crowns and I tried to calculate each time I bought stuff to swedish currency but yeah. didnt work. I even tried using the calculator to summon up the total and later go on Google to “exchange” and see how much it would be in swedish money.. It always came out wrong. Even though I wrote the exact numbers they showed on pricing.
● Stone roads
oh my god! Stone roads everywhere. you know those roads made of pieces of stones/bricks? They are everywhere . They are pretty to see but awful to walk on entire days
● The heat
I’m used to heat but Sweden and Italy is waaaay different! In Sweden its kinda hot and dry but the fact that Italy has the sea around it (we have woods etc) it made the air.. moist.
● Shopping mall near the hotel
Near my hotel, there were a shopping center/mall with 6 floors. For me personally it was a bad mall. Only store I bought from was the foodstore at tge bottom floor
● The food
no explanation needed. I have written about it earlier
● Got clothes stolen
I came back to my hotelroom one day after have been into the town taking photos, where I noticed my one bag of clothes were gone. Note this bag was on top of my suitcase and open so it showed it was clothes/ used. I spoke with the people in the reception and they didnt take any responsibility for it so.. yeah.. fun.. not.
● Same bedsheets
Even though I had cleaning etc daily and me talking via Google translator about changing bedsheets etc (mind you that the heat was up to +45°C and as a heavy girl, that is hot!) which they understood what it said cuz they showed me in their communication, I asked daily for new sheets. Unfortunately they “changed” it by just flipping the sheets over or turned it. Emma, how do you know they did that? Well, on my first day I accidentally dropped a piece of chocolate so it melted and I saw that stain every damn day.
● No working Air Conditioning (AC)
I had to ask the front desk if I could borrow a fan, or else I knew I wouldn’t be able to sleep at all.
● Television / the tv
While I was charging my phone i tried to watch some tv. Luckily they had Crime channel and was showing Law & Order, Special Victims Unit which I love. So I thought I was gonna be able to have a date with Detective Tutola (Ice T) but sadly, the connection in tv was horrible and they had removed english subtitles. Even though I understand English, I can’t understand everything.
Last words for this blogpost
I really liked being in Italy but unfortunately I was so bored and so upset on how it was. Personally one week in same place is to long. I wanted to leave the day after I arrived. I was not impressed.
Remember that this post is my words, my opinions and my experiences. What I experienced in Italy might not be the same for you. Keep that in mind!
due to my bad memory and memory loss I have due to the mental health (bad) I can’t remember everything so bare with me. I will make posts when ever I remember something else than this. Iam truly truly sorry for this.
Personal recommendations
Would i recommend to go to Venice? Yes. It’s a good place for a first time solo traveler.
Is it safe? Yes it is safe. At least I had no problems being there (other than my camera bag strap) but make sure to do your research.
Something to remember? IMPORTANT! four things!
• Pickpockets ! Use mini locks if you can when you are out. I did that and no one could take stuff. They tried once to cut my camera bag strap though when I had my cameras with me to the city (first or second day I was there) so I had to throw the strap away. So be aware!!!
• Souvenirs shops. They will try rip you off! so be aware of that! Try barging as much as you can! (I’m horrible at that honestly)
• Use card as payments! Every store / sellers I met and saw took card! Minimize having cash on you! You will be a bigger target if you have cash on you!
• Hidden sellers! There are hidden sellers who will try lure you in to places to buy stuff. Black market I think it called. Do not go with them!
More recommendations
• SHOES! make sure you have comfortable shoes! You will walk alot.
• Drink a lot of water! With strong rays from the sun and the heat, you must drink a lot of water so avoid getting dehydrated. Trust me it ain’t fun!
• Hat / cover your head! Trust me!
• Salted potato chips, sugar and water! Look for foodstores when you are out. Due to the heat you will need to buy alot of extra water but also salted potato chips/ crisps. They do not have fluid replacements . I asked for it literally in every store I went in and drugstores. salt, sweet and water is what you need for replacement of that.
I will repeat drink water alot but you really need to!
if you have any questions, feel free to ask me. I will gladly answer them 🥰
Thank you for reading this long blogpost and if you ever go to Venice, tell me. Have you been there? hat was your plus and Minus? I would love to know.
Pictures from Venezia / Venice, Italy will come up in the blog. I will show you all the photos i have taken there so 🥰 dont worry. they are coming!
ransom pictures from my trip to Venezia / Venice, Italy.
I will actually just post pictures and make a whole post later of each day of what I did. I have edit so many pictures and forgotten to move them to each seperate edit map per day so here we go. There will be many posts of this kind with pictures.
Everywhere i go, even if it’s near by when I live, I always tend to take a lot of pictures so I apologize in advance for many posts with just pictures
.. its really funny how a song from a cartoon movie can hype me up and make me dance around outside without any care of people.
I get in my zone when I hear this song and it goes on repeat on my phone and in my headphones.
I even listen to the song in the shower.
I listen to the song everywhere
I like them big, I like them chunky (chunky) I like them big, I like them plumpy (plumpy) I like them round, with something, something (something) They like my sound, they think I’m funky (funky)
Big & Chunky with Will.i.Am. Such a funny and catchy song.
I recommend this song if you have a bad day and need some fun and hype song.
some funny part of the lyrics.
I like them chunky, chunky, chunky Chunky, chunky, chunky (chunky) And plumpy, plumpy, plumpy Plumpy, plumpy, plumpy (plumpy) Chunky, chunky, chunky Chunky, chunky, chunky (chunky) And plumpy, plumpy, plumpy, plumpy
Ain’t nothing wrong with loving chunky (chunky) I like them funny, I like them spunky (spunky) I like them witty, I like them smart (with brains) Girl, I like your big (what you say?) Your big ol’ heart, what? Girl, you’re crazy, she drive me crazy (crazy) I love my lady, she nice and shapely (shapely) She nice and spacey, take so much space up Like a big ol’ spaceship (ooh-woo), yeah, so gracious, yeah
I mean, how can you not get hyped up with this song? As a plus size/overweight woman I get to hear all kind of nasty comments from people so this song is a fun song that actually hype my confidence up.
..i have always been overweight due to PCOS (I can write about that later) but short version; I have cysts on the ovaries and that causes weight gain quickly and makes it superhard to lose weight. but iam working on it.
While I was in Italy, I had some questionable “fashion” choices. As an overweight person i really challenged myself to get out of my comfort zone. Due to the heat i tried to keep myself as cool/colder as possible. …. which you will see below. I looked funny and honestly, I didn’t really care what people thought or said about me.
“im fat, I have a child, its hot and im on vacation. I am never seeing these people again” was my “mantra” or what to call it to really try get out of my comfort zone.
(bad habit on last picture. there for pixels to cover. Iam not promoting the bad habit but I want to be all true with you all)
I also walked around barefoot alot. During summer, I really dislike wearing socks and shoes. booyyy, all the looks I got from people for doing that.
I also have a bad habit (since I was 14) so I went out many times during my days. If I really tell you that I tried to not get bothered by people, their words or looks.. I tried hard!
at the hotel i stayed had, there was a convenience store/ grocery store around the corner. During summer and in heat I can not eat food. I try but it always make me sick so luckily that store was close and dont be surprised but I actually been there with towel turban.. a few times and also when I have been outside doing my bad habit (smoke)
Wearing towel turban doesn’t bother me honestly, its more of showing skin/fat on my body but I did it 🙌🏻 for a whole week! Iam actually proud of myself that I managed to get out of my comfort zone while being there. If I get out of my comfort zone now when I’m home, is questionable. But I do walk barefoot and have towel turban when I go to the store. M doesn’t like it though but I have done that ever since I moved to my own places.
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Confession time I have actually weighed almost 200kg and I have lost 85kg so iam still big but the struggle is now harder but iam working on it. So in future I will also share here in my blog about my weightloss journey. I hope that is OK with you all.
calms me down. Karl-Heinz , the cyclone from Poland is passing by right now. Heavy rain. Thunder and wet air.
I’m currently (i know my window isn’t fancy) in bed, enjoying and listening to the sound of rain when it hits the ground and roof. The big and heavy smatter against the metal roof and glass window. like music to my ears.
When it rains, I focus on the noise The white/Grey noise that happens when the rain falls. It calms me down. It makes me brain calm for a bit.
Even though i posted a story on Instagram with a video recording of the rain with text “Karl-Heinz, my dude. chill a little” I dont want it to calm down. I need this noise. Perfect moment it came.
I can go more deep in this post but i wrote enough deep stuff etc yesterday so no more of that now. Yes, I am keeping it real. I’m honestly and open with my struggles here. Maybe I can inspire someone or maybe I can help someone.
my window; i have started to throw away stuff and when I was in Norway, my sister took all my flowers to replant them and I still havent gotten them back. the Halloween decorations on the window is something my son put up two years ago. No I havent taken them down. They are some kind of slime. Nasty to touch.
Hello my loves! iam currently in the bath writing this post. As you all know, I went back home to Sweden last Saturday (26th) and yesterday (sunday) was a huge struggle for me.
I was awake the entire time! I didnt sleep at all that night, or on the plane nor the train. I didnt go to sleep until 11pm so i dont know how many hours that I was awake (and im honestly to tired to count right now).
I really tried to get some sleep on the plane and train but no. I couldn’t. not even for a second.
breakfast/lunch/the day before dinner
Saturday ; it was one stressful morning / day. I didnt sleep anything at all. Everything was closed at the airport when I arrived there so I had to wait to be able to buy something to eat. Luckily I had ice tea with me that I drank until a coffee shop opened.
The sandwich was very.. interesting. I dont know what kind of ham they have in Italy but its way different than what im used to.
Sandwhich; edamer cheese, some lettuce and some ham. Heated up. ●●●● 2 of 5.
Fruit cup; mix of apple, pineapples, melon and peach. ●●●● 3 of 5. I couldn’t eat the apples due to problems and the reason why so low in points was because to tasted like its been out in the sun for hours.
Ice tea – Peach; When it comes to ice tea iam very very picky so I was actually surprised that I found an ice tea from a convenience store next to my hotel where I stayed at, that I really liked. Not so sweet and not so bitter. Perfect combination. ●●●● 4 of 5. The flavors was smashing but there’s something I cant put finger on that I was missing. I recommend this tea tho! (I will see if I find a picture later of it)
At the airport in Stockholm, Sweden I got really mad because my luggage was delayed and actually lost but later was found. Fortunately I got it in time so I could take the train I had tickets to instead of buying new ones. The amount of stress and to find the right platform of right side of the airport for the right train etc was .. wow. but luckily I managed JUST IN TIME to find it.
While waiting those few minutes I had to spare before the train came i noticed that the suitcase of mine was damaged! It is the second time I use this suitcase! I have never in my life ever thought that it was true with what I have seen.. that the airport damage someones property/ belongings and now I have seen it myself! I was (still are) beyond me. Mad? Yes! Upset? Ofcourse! Kinda make myself feel dumb? Oh yes! Like never in my wildest dreams I ever thought this would actually happen!
with 3% battery left on my phone i made a quick call to notify M about the suitcase. After several pictures taken later, I finally stepped on the train. Smacked the suitcase behind me and just sat down. Tried to get a little bit of sleep but during the train home I felt how my bloossugar was declining and going down so I rushed to grab the fruit cup I remembered I had.
On the train I edited some photos I took and tried this black and white contrast thing. I dont know what I feel / if I like them but here is some I show you before I talk about yesterday (Sunday)
Click on picture to see them full size.
Sunday; with the big S.. sleeping.. I was so tired yesterday. I fell asleep three times within a few hours. It was like someone had smacked my head several times with something big and heavy. I couldn’t keep my eyes open. So after E went to sleep I finally went to bed.. 20.15pm ish or so.
I didnt have any energy. It’s like all those sleepless nights I had in Venice due to migraine and heat just came crashing down on me and yeah. Today iam feeling a bit better. Still super tired but a bit better. Back to reality life. Routines is finally starting again with E and his school. Night schedules are changed back and now comes the hard part… to get myself up and stay awake during the days.
Two weeks / 14 days left til I go back to school and become a student. .. AGAIN! But this time im actually taking a big step in right directions to become the preschool teacher for special need childen. I can’t wait! I’m excited but on same time im terrified because its at the same school as I did my nurse education and I hate that school.
im gonna fix more pictures and add them here in the blog. I will also share some on my instagram; thecaffeinatedraccoon yes it is really my username on Instagram. I had to change due to the stalker in my former school and havent changed back since. I might do that one day.
If you won two free plane tickets, where would you go?
How funny this question pops up when I just got back to Sweden 🙌🏻
okey, two plane tickets. Hm that is actually a really hard one but due to the fact that Mykanos and Santorini is in the same country, I will use one ticket there. And the second plane ticket? hm. Bali, Vietnam or a safari in Botswana or Kenya. That would be amazing. See elephants in their natural habitat. Yes I love elephants 🐘 Have been since I was very very young.
