Typical. When the internship has only been one week and my back decide to break down.

Hey guys! Last week (w. 15. 7 of April to 10th of april) I had my first week at the internship, like I wrote a little bit on the last post. Today was supposed to be the start of the second week – well supposed and supposed.. It is but sadly I had to stay home today.

L u m b a g o is back and it seems to really dislike me. It actually started one day during the internship. I felt the pain when I was around the kids so I said straight out “nooo nononononononooo” and my supervisor asked me what was wrong so I told her and last night it came.

Woho. Hopefully I can go back to the internship tomorrow if my back allows me. Normally I have lumbago for a week so pray for me 😵‍💫

Positive things during all this is that I have learned all 35 kids names and trust me, that has been hard. So I’m actually a bit proud of myself on that part and it is actually a big / huge step forward for me due to my memory loss due to stress and depression. So yay! 》I also have realized that (ok this might not be as positive but on same time it is) my body won’t be able to work with 1-3 year old children due to lifting, holding them etc. I love children but I have to listen to my body for once.

If I’m able to go back to the internship this week, I’m actually changing location to try and see how the next stage of preschool. 4-6 year old kids. I have met almost everyone of them  – some (even at my place with 1-3 year olds) has been sick and had week off due to Easter break. But I still know their names and how they look like. They have their names and a picture of them on their dressing shelf (outdoor clothes. I dont really know what it calls so lets go with that).

An other positive thing is that I can continue with what am doing when moving in shadows! I promise I will tell you all later but for now. Shhhh 🤫

A negative thing; I bought new phone due to this phone’s OLED display panel is ruined and I was hoping I would get the phone pretty fast (normally within few days in Sweden) but sadly.. I don’t know when I’m gonna get it. I just got an email from the company that they are still waiting on the delivery of the phones to their warehouse. So I hope this phone holds on for a bit longer. I’m scared it will die on me and I have my banking, buscard etc on my phone.  So I’m nervous, scared and extremely frustrated on the whole situation!

The phone wallet case has arrived though so I can protect the phone. But to be fair, I bought this phone as a present for myself when I graduated nurse assistant school and it’s about .. two or three years ago? Ohmygod. So long ago. I rarely change phones. Some people change often and here I come, with a phone that i bought years ago and before that I had my other phone for 4 years. Lol! So no I don’t spend a lot on technology except headphones. My laptop is 9 years and still working even with cracked frame. Lol!

Oh well, as they say, “someone who’s waiting on something good, never waits too long” (den som väntar på nått gott, väntar aldrig för länge). I think it’s just a swedish expression / saying but I can be wrong..

Spring is here. Finally. I will show you guys pics i have taken lately (Easter, weather changing within two days etc)  soon.

I need to go rest now due to the lumbago. So I’m gonna put the phone away and listen to music while in bath, hoping that the pain will atleast get a little better.

Happy New week! And let’s kick .. ass.. Sorry it came up in my head. Maybe I should learn to not wrote everything that pops up in my head.

Bye my beautiful souls.

No matter what I do, no matter what I say… they always make me look like the bad guy in the situations. Even when I want them to know that it was not ok and I didn’t want to be disrespected like I was.

Disrespected ● angry ● I give up

Hello my loves. I know I have been quiet for a few days (3 days, except the daily prompts) and reason is; I haven’t felt well. I feel much better (except for what was said today) so I will try come back ASAP.

I did three exams on Wednesday and I passed them. Shocking because I didn’t study but yay!

Today I had the meeting . . . . the meeting i wish never happened. If you guys remember from this post (clickable link) you know why I was in the meeting.

The meeting went horribly wrong. According to the principal, I am a liar. She laughed at me when I spoke, so I told her not to laugh at me because that makes me mad, which it actually did. The teachers denied it, and the principal is protecting their asses – which I also said to the principal.

So it’s like, the teachers can say and do whatever they want towards students and people, but when a student/person defends themselves or takes action in their own hands (in my case, writing to the principal AND the teacher, letting them know that I am not accepting and not ok with what was said and done), it results in them being disrespected by powers (the powers are the principal and teachers).

Of course I got mad (and I know they read my blog HEEEEEEEEY!!!!!! I’m pissed at you!) and got into a defense mode. I know what she said (and so does everyone else in the class but is too damn scared to stand up) and what happened. I left the class and haven’t been to her class since then—yup, not one time. So we’ll see if I go back there after the internship next week.

Right now, this will eat me inside because I want to explode on both the teachers and questioning them so much but I’ll be the bigger person and take it to the next step. 🙌🏻 Which step? Oh, I will tell you all later. No it’s not a threat though 🤷 So they can’t do anything about that. Oops.

So, whatever I say or do, I am always the bad guy according to people. Even when the truth comes out and someone is standing up against the person who does wrong. They are so scared of what could happen.

That was the meeting. It was longer but no bother to write it, it would only make me mad again.