Sometimes I wonder what kind of class I’m studying.. Sockpuppets??
We had a theme.. Animals and staff in preschool. Make sockpuppets to have a theater to solve conflicts.. I didn’t want to make an adult so I made a weird looking bat. To my defense, the scissors to cut with was awful. If I had my tools that I had at home, it would be alot prettier. Lol. Now it looks.. I don’t know.. But it looks funny!
Sadly my teacher told me to do a sockpuppet you can use it to “talk”.. No. Those gives me creeps. Lol! Luckily, I can do what I want and no need to do anything else. Lol when it comes to crafting will mean.
Hi hello my beautiful souls! My life has been insanely dumb towards me there for I have been quiet. I actually made a recap post yesterday but didn’t post it due to me writing it on my way to school and I actually got “car sick” lol. Bus sick maybe is a better term. I will post it later though.
BUT HOW ARE YOU!? Suck a long time ago (January 22nd I think)
I apologize for my absence. Long story short (longer in an other post) mental health, new medicine, stopped instantly with my old medicine with out “stepping out” on it and a lot more.
Here I am though! Not mentally stable yet but slowly working towards it! One step at the time!
the hustle. the stress. the panic. the warnings. It made my head go loco.
But guess who managed to fix it? I DID!!!! I got a warning from my teacher that I was about to fail some classes, and this is the last week I have to do the last of the assignments. I have been sitting for several days for HOURS and just worked my butt off and sent them in. I now “only” have five left plus a presentation on Monday, and after that I am done for this first semester!
So I am extremely happy and actually surprised, plus in shock of myself. One week and I have sent in… I don’t know how many assignments. Is that my ADHD working? Better under pressure? I have no idea, but I can honestly say—next semester and the last one, I do NOT want to do this again!
So because of this, my head is now all loco! Hopefully I can take a small break this weekend and get some rest for my head but if I know myself.. I won’t.
This year my mental health has really declined so much, but I’m hopeful that next year will be a better year. I started with a new medicine a week ago for my ADHD (I requested it myself), and it has actually helped me get a bit more focus. Sure, I’m still tired, so I also got new sleeping pills that knock me completely out. So I haven’t taken them every day—two pills since last week. I will only take it when E is not home and I have nothing important the day after. Mama needs her sleep! That’s why I’m hopeful! Hopefully it will help me get better.
I have even started to do some makeup which has been superloooong time ago. Last Monday (15th) I had red eyelook and visited my last internship location before school. Let me tell you guys, the look on my kids / students. Oh my. They complimented me so much and that actually made me happy so I have been using makeup twice this week.
So I am a bit hopeful about 2026. I’m working hard to become myself. The bubbly, happy, laughing, goofy Emma.
Thank you everyone for reading. 🤍 As you know, my head is all messed up now, so I apologize that I haven’t answered any comments yet. I will when my head allows me. Even writing this post takes energy. Plus I have been at an education presentation today, and I actually fell asleep for a few seconds, so today is a tired day for me.
Two things in this post. Please answer the list part. If you can ofcourse.
Sometimes it’s all listening and no fun, but also sometimes we have fun. Today was one of those days!
Hello, my loves! I hope you all are doing good today!
Today i have actually been the whole day in school except for the last hour because I had to leave earlier so I could catch the bus so I could get my son in time (problems with the principals at the extra after-school place)
Today in school we had fun project which was to make a presentation where we had in our minds that we are teachers and worked with kids in preschool / day care. Everyone did good and I jumped in with my presentation with other kind of songs that the teacher gave links to.
We had to think about the children with special needs, how we could / would adapt us to them so they could participate as well. Well with everyone, not only special need kids.
We had to include movements, play, and all that stuff. We also had to think of any aids (that sounds so weird) so everyone saw the structure of the activity, etc.
In Sweden (I don’t know how preschool and schools work in other countries), they use visual support to show what will happen, so everyone included that! We also had to keep in mind the sign support.
So what did I do? Well, my son is always listening to songs on YouTube where the singers do signs when singing—not like sign language but using their body and hands to reinforce words they sing. I hope you all understand what I mean.
Anyway, I picked out three songs from that singer/group, and it was so fun. Everyone (almost) participated in the signs and songs. Some didn’t.
After everyone had their presentation of their projects (some worked in groups, and some did the project individually—I did it alone), we continued to listen to children’s music—which you can see in the pictures.
I have started a diet and I was wondering if someone has done the same or maybe a similar or something else.
I have started with the 16:8 diet, and I just started it last Sunday (26th of October 2025), and so far it goes well, but I’m worried. I have googled and checked if it’s ok to do this diet when having type 2 diabetes, which I have, and it says it’s ok. I’m wondering and have questions about it, but no, I can’t contact a doctor about it. I’m still waiting on them to contact me about anotherthing but also about taking blood samples—anyway, I am so confused. What is ok, and what is not ok? What can I eat? What can I drink? How will my blood sugar react and act? Like I said, I have googled around and checked official websites for healthcare, etc., in Sweden, but still, so many questions.
I did something I wasn’t allowed to do, but I just had to. I sneaked to take a photo of my shoes after some children had fun and sneaked to add the magnetic letters on my shoes.
What they thought was that I didn’t feel anything, but what they didn’t know was that I felt and knew they were doing it but played along.
I know I broke one rule, but I took this picture way, way, waaaay away from any children, so I was still thinking of where to take it. Also made sure no names were shown or pictures of the children.
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Hello, my beautiful pumpkins! Yes, I can officially call you all my pumpkins because now it’s HALLOWEEN SEASON! Woho!
Today I had my third day at my internship (3 of 5), and no more for this week. The start of the day was chaotic! Oh my god! It started with the alarms on my phone not going off, and I woke up at 06:54am… my bus left at 07:10am, so you all can imagine the stress! But I managed to get myself out to the bus stop. Here comes another thing that made the day more chaotic: the bus was super late! Oh my god. So I messaged the preschool I’m having the internship at, explaining, and it was okay for them, but I apologized!
I do not want to come more late than I already do (with agreement with my supervisor) due to my son and his taxi to school.
I basically ran to the preschool, so I tried to get in closer “time” to when I normally am there. I managed... by five minutes after my normal time. Oh my. It was insane!
My supervisor was home today (reason no need to be added here), so I was with two other teachers, and it was good. It was really good. to see how they worked and their routines!
Today, on my third day,I have been doing bracelets and necklaces made of plastic beads that children in preschool use and make jewelry from. Super cute. ● I have been pretty much all day sitting at a table with some children and made bead jewelry and bead plates. ● One child and I wanted to do a Halloween pumpkin, but they didn’t have a printed-out picture, so I used my phone to find one for inspiration, etc., until one of my supervisors today was available. I asked for their tab and explained. ● I have also been reading books for the kids (nerve-wracking!), and they liked it! Woho! ● We also went to another part of the preschool (they have three departments, or whatever you want to call it) with some children so they/we could play with big blue blocks, and oh boy, how much fun we had!
This was pretty much my day (more happened but can not write about that) and I am happy. I was able to help children (without my supervisors) with getting dressed, to help with food etc.
So now I only have two more days here at the preschool, and I’m honestly really sad about that. The children are wonderful, and the staff is amazing! I hope they all see how much I like it here and how much I try.
Next week, I’m back to school but also have two more days of the internship.
I haven’t blogged on Monday or Tuesday.I have been at the internship, and I have been so drained of energy. Especially last Monday (September 8). My first day. Oh my god.
When I came home, I fell asleep in the armchair (is that the correct word?) . I was tired!
From first step of the day til I left for the day;
I met up with my supervisor at the internship. When I heard the name from my teacher, like two weeks before I had the internship, I had a feeling of who it was. Aaaaaand I was correct!
My supervisor was a classmate of my sister A, and my sister M went to the same class as my supervisor’s brother. So I knew who she was. I mean, how small is the world?
Anyway, I came there (after being confused about how to get there) after a little bit. Met my supervisor, and we talked a lot. She told me about the rules, what I had to observe, what to do, etc. It was so much, but I have managed to remember everything.
My first mission (for me) was to try to memorize the names of the children plus who is who. Wooh, boy, that was a challenge.
(I am not gonna write so much about the preschool but i can talk a little bit of activites I did etc) I spoke with my supervisor and told her that I am a blogger and also a photographer. I asked what their secrecy when it came to me writing and photos (I already knew to not take pictures where any child was in the picture) – I asked if I could take picture of for an example if I was drawing with the children and I showed her how I meant and took a picture of a table so she could see what I meant. No! There was no children near or around the area I took the picture off.
At first she said yes after seeing the picture and that I made it crystal clear how I was taking pictures if I was allowed. But after a while after our talk I came up to her, just to talk again about my blog and photos. I explained that I was thinking a lot about the talk we had about pictures and I felt it was not a good idea and she agreed on that. I mean, sure I blog but why take pictures on activites? (Yes I know how it sounds like here when I write about it but talking swedish and try to explain to english with words I know might cause problems but I want to share this moment anyway – even though my english is super duper bad I do not mean any harm or anything. Which my supervisor understood)
ok that was a lot () but I will explain with all this. For me, its important for people know about my memory and how I use my blog to remember stuff that has happened and I also share pictures. I told my supervisor all this and explained when it started to happen (after my father’s death) and she understood. (I know i might sound repetitive now) I also explained her that im a photographer. (I know, maybe useless information for her and even share that but I will get to my point) I told her I love taking photos and now when it’s autumn here in Sweden, I love taking photos of the nature with all colors and contrast.
I asked her if I had permission to take photos of the nature (example on a tree with different colors) and she said yes, as long as no children is near and it’s calm around (OFC!) so we agreed that I could take pictures of the nature as long as it also doesnt show the location, any children or so. Ofcourse! 1000% completely understood.
Let’s get back to the photos of activites now when i have shared a little back story of all this and why I asked.
My intention of taking pictures of activites I did while I was there (drawing, playing games etc) was for myself to remember what I did that day. Like I wrote above, my memory is awful and seeing pictures and read a bit about it, helps me remember. At first it was a yes and I had permission to do that but after been thinking a lot about this (pictures) and remembered some news that has happened, I had a feeling not to do it which I told my supervisor and like I said, she agreed on it and we came to the conclusion that I am allowed to write about my days at the preschool (I even offered her to read everything and check if it’s ok or not but she said she trusted me and didnt need to read) and I could write from my perspective etc. For an example “Today I have been sitting at a smaller table with a few kids at the preschool and we were drawing, laughing and had fun”.
So I will not share any pictures from my days at the preschool (this time and also next semester in school. I’m going to be there for four weeks) but I will share text about my days.
This picture is took with my supervisor next to me. We both laughed when we saw this. Childhood memories
Woop well lets get back to my first day at the internship!
On my first day, I learned the names of the children (I struggled with a few). ● I attended to their daily routines. ● Breakfast, lunch, and afternoon snack. ● I stopped a situation that could have caused an accident—a child was banging on a window. ● I got a chance to supervise children outside on their break. ● Two children got attached to me 🥺 They trust me and that is the biggest reward ever. ● Four children came up to me and said, “We want you to have these. These are for you,” and gave me the flower petals in the picture at the top—I got them from children that wasn’t from my class. 🥺
On my second day, I helped the children get dressed to go out (rain outfits) and put the vests on. That was huge for me because the children had grabbed their vests and gave them to me to put them on them. ● I had responsibilities for three children when we went to the kitchen to get the lunch for everyone. They did so well, and the kitchen staff told me I did so well with the children (I played with them to stand against the wall and wait until I had rolled out the trolley with the food out in the hallway). They did fantastic! And they were listening so well to me, and I let them pull the trolley while I was holding on to it in front. They laughed so much because I joked with them while walking back to the class. ●I had the responsibility to set the tables for all the children and teachers. I also was the one who said what the food was, etc. ● We had a bit of a dance after having a “lesson” of emotions (the color monster), and that day was the blue monster, which is the sad monster. When the “lesson”/activity was over, the teacher played happy music, which made the children jump, dance, and laugh, so I joined them 🤭. That made them join even more, but we all had fun.
These are just a few things from the first two days that I did. So far, it is amazing, and I love it. Even when I have a headache 24/7. I love it.
Oh! Fun thing:one child saw when I spoke once that I had “something black in my mouth” (the child’s words) and wanted to see. I showed the child, and oh boy, that child was fast to tell the others about it after I told the child (after the child asked what it was and why I had it) that I have a hole in my tongue and I wanted to have it. Within 5 minutes, all the kids knew about it and all wanted to see it. What would I do?I showed it, and they checked their tongues to see if they had the same. One teacher laughed when I showed it. But honestly, I’m not sure if I was allowed to do it but I think it’s all good because the children asked what it was, etc. (knowledge?).
Anyway, these were my first two days. I was supposed to be there today as well, but I had to change days till next week because of personal reasons, so tomorrow (Thursday) will be my last day at the internship for this week, and next week I do these two days I miss this week.
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I know this was a super long post, and I am thankful and grateful that you took your time to read this.
I just want to re-explain: I will not take pictures. I will write about my days. ● Even though I know my explanation makes me sound weird, it was nothing in my intentions.It’s hard for me to explain with correct words. My supervisor understood me and what I meant, so that is the most important.
I know, I know! I didn’t blog yesterday due to the fact it was my birthday and I just wanted to try have a social media free day.
For my birthday, I actually didn’t do so much. Had a meeting in the morning, went to the drugstore, and then back home. Did the dishes, went grocery shopping, had dinner while watching a movie, and sat a few hours in the the bath. Listening to cozy rain and thunder sounds.
M asked what I wanted to do for my birthday earlier and I said I really dont know (my birthday is never been celebrated). We could eat outside but do to what happened, I said we can celebrate it later. So we are. It was cozy still thom Movie and dinner at home.
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Today in school, we all had to do a collage of things that is “health” for us. Each one got to do their own. I made mine (the picture) with a twist.
What is really health for me? Well, for me it’s a lot. Not only weightloss, eat healthy, exercise etc. For me, health is also what I like.
On my collage there is a lot of models and can actually be a collage about fashion etc but it’s not. How will i be able to explain this? Fashion for me is personally. I have pictures of fashion and also a picture of a family with an alternative style.
Why fashion? Like I wrote above, it’s personal. Like, you express yourself how you want and be yourself. The alternative picture is a symbol for me that even as a mother you can stand out and not fall for the traps of society. Do you understand what I mean? 😅
Also the pictures is a part of my interest, which where the camera comes in on the picture and the flower pictures. Photography is an important piece of me. It gives me joy, happiness and quiet time. I can spend hours outside when I’m on photowalks. Where the exercise and health comes into the picture.
Paris Hilton & Lindsay Lohan; I have always been a fan of both of them. Fashion, music, movies etc. So ofcourse they went up on my collage. Sadly I couldn’t find any of Britney Spears (she’s the queen!) but if I find one, I will put it up there as well.
Eyes, lips, thr girls/models = makeup. Happiness, confidence and power for me.
The dog, with the text “Du har visst tid” / You don’t have time” . A reminder to slow things down, relax and look up for obstacles and it’s ok to feel upset / sad. (the dog looks sad on the picture).
Have you ever done a collage like this? What would you put on yours and why?
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PICTURE OF A SNAKE BELOW!
Also today in school, a classmate and I went to a store to buy energy drinks for her and a Pepsi mac for me. While on our walk there I looked down on the road as usual when I walk and saw what I thought was a worm but had to double look because it had a weird pattern for being a “worm”.
It was a baby snake! I picked it up! Such a cutie.
I absolutely love snakes! I don’t get why people are scared of them and think they are disgusting but I do respect people who feel that way. Me? I love them. If I could, I would have a lot of them in my home.
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The janitor in school has actually been super kind to me and put a separate desk for me in the classroom. I asked him if they had a table where you can rise and lower the table and they had 🙌🏻 Due to me having problems with my back, knees, and hip (after all the weight loss), I struggle while sitting in class. The tables are so low, and the chair hurts my back so bad. So I asked for one so I could stand up when needed, AND I LOVE IT! My own little space! Sure where it stands it makes it difficult for me to see the PowerPoint presentations but luckily the teachers always upload them in Google classroom (not sponsored).
Yeah this was a bit about yesterday and today. A post that is all over the place but I can’t honestly think of a simpler way to write about these two days 😅
I’m off to bed, and I apologize again for being so quiet on the blog. More, more, more will come! Stay tuned!
one step closer to my new career. I’m excited but terrified on the same time.
After 11th August it will come up school posts. My daily life, lifestyle. I hope you all are excited and ok with following my journey to become a preschool teacher with specialized for diagnosis.
They arrived with Early Bird which means they come really fast in the mail. To my surprise, the books came within two days. That’s crazy fast!
I got a notification on my phone that it was delivered and my heart took an extra skip. Now it feels kinda official that I will be one step closer.
I am scared though. Will I be able to manage to understand the academic words? Sure it’s not as hard as University level of my future school but after been scanning /looking through them fast, my brain stopped working.
I will have more courses during this education but these are the first three books I’ll use for the first semester. According to the schedule, there will be two more different classes per week but no books to them? I am so confused about that.
As you all can read, I have mixed feelings about this career choice. I really want this but I am terrified… of failing, of the school, of the classmates, teachers etc. How will it go? So many thoughts, feelings etc that I need to sort out and try find the motivation and the encouragement that I’m getting closer to the job I really want.
Hello my loves! today has been a hectic day on the blog and real life. It just occurred to me that I start in school in 1O days! What!?
This time I am actually super nervous and scared. Just like when I did my nurse assistant education. This education is at the same school that I hate and where I did the N A E. My former high-school. I have so many bad bad memories from there.
I’m nervous due to new class, new teachers and my size in a school with 3K kids. Yes iam preparing mentally for bullying I just have to get used to it. Hard, yes but I must.
School supplies I need to buy; There is alot! Notebooks, pencils, rubbers, books, etc. Ohmy. Books is ordered for this semester though. But not for the other two but one step at the time.
I have totally forgotten what is needed when studying! Except when I did math, but now iam going back to a big school . Which bag? backpack? hand bag? shoulder bag? Style? dye my hair before that? makeup? Entry access card?
So much to think off! For fun I checked on Shein (no im not ordering there, just browsing to get ideas of what I need to buy) and I found a cute pencil case, bags etc but we all know how Shein is. I used to love them but not now after truth has come out.
What education am I doing this time? This time I am not gonna study so my grades gets better. I’m actually gonna study so I take one step closer to the education preschool teacher. I dont really know how to translate the education from Swedish to english other then I use google translator and that translation sounded so weird.. but (according to Google translator) Childcare training with focus on disabilities. .. sounds so weird. On swedish it’s Barnskötare med specialisering funktionsnedsättning.
When I’m done with this education I can work in preschool with special need kids. Student assistant to someone who needs extra help etc. I am so excited about that part.
How did I come up with this idea to become this? Well, I love teaching stuff. I hate standing infront of a whole class though but teaching one on one is no problem. Also I get a chance to learn more about my son’s diagnosis, what to do, how to communicate etc. So its a winwin for me.
Why the career change? honestly, the N.A.E was a promise to my mother before she passed. I have always struggled with what I actually wanted to work with in life. Even though I love taking care of elderly people, I have seen so much that has made me change my mind. It has given me some sort of trauma (not the elderly but the staff and no matter how much you tell the boss, nothing happens) so I decided to stop work at the hospital, senior homes etc.
With this, I can actually help and teach children. Be their helping hand on the same time as I get to learn more professionally about diagnoses etc.
Excited, nervous, terrified and happy. Mixed feelings about this but I think its because the education is held at my former high school.
Hopefully these feelings and thoughts will pass as soon as I start in school and gotten to know the people.
Hello everyone! I hope you all are doing good! I’m currently in bed for the night, but I wanted to pop in here and say hello!
Today has been pretty hectic due to meetings at hospital, monthly grocery shopping within a time limit which was very stressful, repack food before putting in freeze box, study etc. it has been crazy today so now I’m finally in bed.
Today’s quick dinner while study; left over pizza. Yesh not healthy but it was something over from last night when M and son ate pizza (I always take chicken salad). *snapchat & filter*
Every class we get homework todo til next class and with my history of math etc, I struggle really hard.
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Confession time; I am dead scared of going in school now and alone in town. Why? Because I have a massive stalker who goes to same school as me.
Back story; I’ve met this man three times. Once at a busstop, once in school and now the third time in town when I was in town with my bestfriend. He snook up behind me and said “Hi Emma!” and I always answer when people talk to me so I said Hi back. After that, it went down hill. E even tried to help me get away from this man and after a while which felt like years he left so we could walk away. I was crying, very uncomfortable, scared etc. This man has said he was COMING home to me, tried to kiss me, hug me, he touched me etc. More happened but this whole situation trigger me even when thinking of it (I’m shaking rn).
So my school situation right now is that my teacher know (I texted him the same night it happened, he called and we spoke), the boss over the principal knows and has spoken with all teachers so they all are keeping eyes on me. Which feels very wrong to be honest but I really appreciate it. Yet I am dead scared of going to school I even have classmates who ends the classes early to walk with me to the busstop. that’s crazy!
Long story short; I have school five days a week and I really don’t wanna go but still go.
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I hope you all have an amazing day and remember this; you are fantastic and amazing. Never let anyone else tell you something else. Always.. always be true to yourself.
5 things I am grateful for is kinda hard to think out because I am grateful for so many things. All from my son, to my education, to my interests but I’ll try write five things and maybe in future I can write more. Lol!
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Five things I am grateful for
● My son & family I will forever be thankful / grateful for my son who’s a miracle. Growing up the doctors told me to give up my dream (to become a mother) because it would never happen because I’ve PCOS. Yet here I am. A mother for soon seven years. I’m thankful that I have made my own family. A lifepartner and son. My family. ● Education Growing up I had hard time in school – bullying. No help from teachers or what so ever. But today I have an education – nurse assistant and I am currently studying my old grades up to I can become a preschool teacher. The nurseasssitant education was actually a promise to my mother before I died. She wanted my and my siblings to become a nurse so we would help people more than we did. ● Finding myself I’m still working on myself and forever will but lately I have found myself a little bit. I’ve managed to get my real style out in public and not being hiding behind other clothes. I dyed my hair neon red again. I have managed to find focus and things to make myself feel better. ● Emma Santorini blog I’m actually very very grateful for this blog. Even thought I haven’t been updating so much lately (I have posted like 80 posts since august). I’m grateful because I write my thoughts out. Write my life like a journal. Share photographs I’ve taken, ideas, and share my opinions of things. ● YOU! I’m so grateful for you! Why? Because you are you! Never change for anyone. Never change yourself. I’m grateful because you are here. Life is hard but I’m here to help if you need someone to talk.
